Friday 7 June 2013

Staying True to You

I have always taken pride in helping others at any cost. So when I failed to make both the Soph and OC Don team for next year it was a huge blow. I spent much time after the rejection wondering what was wrong with me. What had changed so drastically within myself that from one year to the next, I was no longer good enough? What was I going to do without the program that I myself had benefited so much from? What were my previous frosh going to think of me with only last year's uniform, and would my fellow Sophs who returned shun me because I didn't? I took me many nights with a drenched pillow, late night sob-fests and snappy texts to unsuspecting friends, to realize that the problem wasn't me

The problem is that for the majority of my life, I strongly believed that if you could not put others before yourself at all times, it made you cold and selfish. It took me a while to realize that if you do not allow these moments of "selfishness" from time to time to focus on yourself, you will never be in the right condition to help others. Since I have now set to focus on myself, I've finished 6 books, spent many days outside or with friends and family, as well as accomplish some reflective writing. My most recent piece against government cuts to physiotherapy was recognized at a meeting in Toronto discussing the issue. I have also been able to answer my own questions. My frosh should not think any less of me despite the lack of uniform; if meeting me impacted them as much as meeting them did me, I hope they will carry the memories and experiences we shared fondly. If the opportunity has come to them to take on a leadership role this coming year, or even not, I hope that they take the best and worst of first year and share the lesson learned with a new face. Neither should I be shunned by my fellow Sophs because there are many in the same boat as I who won't have a new uniforms, and only the memories the old ones bear. For my fellow Sophs who do return, I should hope that the friendship formed outlast the year they were forged, because I have an orange treasure box labeled "Occupied" with prof they meant something.

What am I to do without the program I loved so much? Focus on myself, an be wholeheartedly ok with that. I will take my seat on council to help where I can, and make Diego proud. I will not hesitate to put academics and my passion for reading and writing before all else. I will be true to myself…