Keeping the Memories Alive

16 years ago I lost my Nanny Petula Steen to a brain tumour. She was the most strong and beautiful woman I've ever known. I can remember being so excited to be watched by her when my parents were at school or work. I would crawl around her house, following her as she did house chores, and used the washroom. She never got mad about my following her anywhere, she just smiled, picked me up, and commented on what a silly little girl I was. She would usually read an array of my favourite books when I was over. I can recall one in particular about a boy who had a dog he loved very much, but the dog got old and sick and died. The book was about the boy coping with the death of his beloved pet, realizing that though he missed his friend, he was no longer suffering. And sure enough, as soon as the lesson was learned, the boy found a puppy that looked like his old dog and took him home to love. The last page of the book was a picture of the little boy walking the puppy, and the older dog up in the sky, as if watching over him.

I had no idea that my Nanny would ever face a similar thing as to what the book told (I know it's not the same, but that's how a 5 year old connects the dots), when I found out she was sick I thought the doctors would make her better. I only remember snippets of her sickness, like seeing her wear a wig, and wondering why she had to. She was so brave, and so strong and even though she was sick, my memory can't recall her as being anything else. I remember going to see her in the hospital and giving her a teddy that I had to keep her company until she got well. We named him Burp Brownie-Brown, and I still have him today. Though I only remember snippets of things, and only got 5 years with my Nanny, I feel like I got enough love to last a lifetime.

In the beginning, I remember that it was really hard to explain why I only had one grandma. It was almost like I expected her to pop out of a corner and suddenly be well. As the years passed I went on doing things that I thought would make her proud. As I began to graduate and achieve milestones, I would take private moments to grieve, knowing that when I got my diplomas, I wouldn't get to hug her, or see the look of pride on her face. For this reason, graduating frond Western will be one of the hardest things I ever do.

Over the past two years at Kings University College, I have raised over $800 in money towards the cancer society! I do this because I want to make sure my Nanny's memory stays alive. One day I hope that nobody has to ever face the loss of a grandma or loved one! My grandma was the strongest person I will ever know, and with each relay I run or roll, I hope to keep her memory alive and well!

Karli

2012 In Refection

The most important thing I learned in 2012 was that sometimes before you help others, you have to help yourself. Sometimes, that means doing something that seems right to nobody else but yourself. I met so many people, that taught me so many great things! My all-time favorite experience of 2012 was sophing! From it, opened so many different opportunities and so many life lasting friendships! I never expected that I would meet people from all corners of the world, and for that I feel truly blessed, because it brought a perspective that I think everyone needs in their life! 2012 brought me out of my shell, because I was able to introduce my sometimes self-deprecating sense of humour, though I had shared before, I felt more comfortable to express myself with the people around me. I felt even better when I found my friend Diego who shares the same sense of humor and kind pretty much is the fuel to my fire. 2012 showed me that acceptance and kindness exist even though, sometimes they seem sparse, family doesn't always have to be tied by blood, and that figuring your self out has no deadline. No challenge comes without a lesson and solution.

For 2013, my hope is that I can rise to every challenge met, and follow through with the choices I make. I will try to take every chance that is given to me, even though in some cases it might appear to be very uncomfortable. In fact, one of my goals is to actually attempt a comedy open mic night! Nothing, besides writing gives me more joy than to make others laugh, even if it is at my own expense. I am also very pleased that I will be starting the new year off right, with a cancer relay for life! There is little better in life, then helping others, and I'm glad to be doing so among the friends I met this year! Thank you to everyone who made 2012 memorable, and here's to a happy 2013! :-)

Karli