I remember telling my sister as a kid all the things I would do if Cerebral Palsy was cured. I would run, skip, jump, dance with the boy who said no before, and my biggest wish was to do Michael Jackson "Thriller" dance. I've never thought my life was that bad being glued by gravity to a chair, but sometimes, especially as a kid, it's hard not to imagine what you could or "should" be doing in your life. Even today it's hard not to get frustrated with planning around a limited worker schedule, asking someone else to wait up for you, just so you can enjoy a Friday night and make it to bed by the end of it. When it comes to the point where that's figured out, the "cool" bars are often the least accessible. My least favourite time of year is the Winter, because I essentially turn into a hermit due to the weather.
One time, when my sister and I were repeating the conversation I often fell into when down, she said she hoped I never was cured. At first I was insulted, and I didn't understand why she wanted such a thing for me. She said being cured would change me into someone unrecognizable from who I was, and today it makes more sense than it ever did. Having Cerebral Palsy has made me realize that burnouts, wheelies, and high speed, trump running, skipping, and jumping. The boy who said no, has a much more closed mind than the one who will say yes. The robot is just as cool as "Thriller". I have more brain cells and a heavier wallet than those who go out every weekend. When I do go out, any bar is "cool" as long as I'm among friends. In the winter, I have a deeper appreciation for movies, reading, and baking, and the friends who stop by to join in when they can. After so many years of thinking the able-bodied were lucky, I realize that I am the lucky one…
Karli
An absolutely beautiful recognition of true happiness. So many people think having the best time means partying or having a major outing or doing anything really that’s out of the ordinary. But really, when you look back and smile at the good times you've had, they’re mostly simple and/or spontaneous moments. Moments you shared with very few people or one person even. Just a movie night with a mug of hot chocolate in the winter, doing the robot, going to really any bar with some friends;those are the things you’ll most probably remember years and years from now. I mean, life wasn’t meant to be taken in large movements. The next day will inevitably arrive, you’ll sleep, and the moment will have passed. But when you have a hundred thousand small moments, you can step back and appreciate the picture a lot more. So that leaves us with the small stuff. It’s all about the detail. And that’s what I believe one should enjoy and cherish most of all - all the little things.
ReplyDeleteYou are the lucky one, Karli, because not many people are lucky enough to come to that realization.